Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Stealth snowmobile already years late, millions over budget.



In a recent report, it was revealed that the Canadian military's plans for a covert snowmobile are already in dire jeopardy due to design flaws and blown budgets.

Originally allotted $620,000 to study the concept of a hybrid snowmobile, a source inside the Department of National Defence (DND) has revealed that the Dual Action Tactical Arctic Stealth Snowmobile prototype is grossly overweight.  In order for it to meet requirements, heavier steel components will be resigned with costly composite materials, and the hybrid engine will increase in size, requiring a much larger battery (thus resulting in further weight gains).

This major redesign has set the project roughly 28 months behind schedule.  It will also require an addition $1,041,500 worth of funding.

The Department of National Defence has stated that it is fully committed to the Dual Action Tactical Arctic Stealth Snowmobile (DATASS).
While not everybody approves of DATASS, we certainly do.  It really is beautiful.  We will continue to pursue DATASS, even though it might not be politically correct.  We need to get our hands on it, before anyone else wants a piece of it.  We already have a line of volunteers who can't wait to ride DATASS.
What is not known is if the Dual Action Tactical Arctic Stealth Snowmobile will be able to overcome its weight issues.   Engineers working on the project do not seem optimistic, with one engineer simply stating:  "DATASS is too fat."

He would not lie...


Happy April Fools.

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